“Peter, I got your WhatsApp pics, and I’m sorry – it’s just too small.”

Joe Biden had a substitute press secretary this week – a hot little number I like to call “Bad Mamma-Jamma”.

She says that the Biden government is listening to the science – and the science is whispering to them that it might be time for more lockdowns!

This is all about saving lives, she said. It has nothing to do with politics. Biden had been saving lives, okay!

Joe Biden is our mommy and he wants to make sure we don’t get hurt, because that is what government is all about: protecting you from your own decisions.

We can’t let the virus win.

She says that these people running the government – whoever they are (no one knows) – will do whatever the science says, and it might be time to lock it all up again.

It may be suspicious that science is an otherworldly entity that is incomprehensible by its very nature, and that the secret people running the Joe Biden government claim to be the only ones capable of communicating with it.

It’s very similar to the situation in Aztec civilization, when the priests claimed that they were the only ones able to talk to the spirits, and that the spirits were telling them to just keep doing human sacrifices.

We have no way of speaking to the science ourselves, so we have no way of verifying that the science is saying what the Biden people claim the science is saying.

Science can’t be fact-checked, because it is an ethereal, otherworldly force.

Biden also personally announced yesterday that he was going to force everyone to wear masks, because of a message he was sent from science.